Say the Right Thing – A Short Story
Mary Shaw was a spirited young girl who lived in a quiet town called Lanfield with her mother, Mrs. Shaw. Their relationship was warm but often filled with humorous disagreements, especially when it came to Mary’s habit of saying exactly what was on her mind. Mrs. Shaw, a polite and social woman, took great pride in proper manners and was eager to build friendships with new people in town.
One day, Mrs. Shaw invited Mrs. Harding and Mrs. Lee to their home. Mrs. Harding was the wife of a wealthy man who had recently moved from London and Mrs. Lee was his sister. Mrs. Shaw hoped the visit would help her make new friends in Lanfield and she wanted everything to go perfectly. Before the guests arrived, she cleaned the house thoroughly and gave Mary a set of very clear instructions.
“Be kind, say things that please people and make them laugh if there’s silence,” she advised. “And remember, when they get up to leave, you must look sorry—not happy!” Mary, brimming with confidence, assured her mother that she could handle it. She repeated the phrases she had learned—”Good afternoon,” “How are you?” and even, “Must you go? Can’t you stay?”—believing these were enough to impress anyone.
Soon, the guests arrived. The visit started well, but it didn’t take long for things to unravel. When Mrs. Harding mentioned they had moved from London, Mary confidently said she had seen her children walking along the road. But Mrs. Harding, slightly annoyed, replied that she had no children. Awkward silence followed. Mrs. Shaw tried to steer the conversation elsewhere, but Mary jumped in with a comment about Mr. Best, a local banker, claiming he “lived in trains” and couldn’t think because he only read newspapers. Unfortunately, Mrs. Lee’s brother was also a banker who did exactly the same thing.
Mary continued her blunders. She mocked a neighbour’s fashion choices—wearing a blue dress with a red coat—only to find that Mrs. Harding dressed the same way. She laughed about Mrs. Cotter staying in bed and always calling the doctor, unaware that both guests shared similar habits. She even insulted a local dog, only to learn it belonged to Mrs. Harding. With each comment, the room fell into uncomfortable silence and Mary’s face slowly turned redder with embarrassment.
As the guests finally prepared to leave, Mrs. Shaw gave Mary one last chance to redeem herself. Instead of saying, “Must you go? Can’t you stay?” as rehearsed, Mary accidentally blurted, “Must you stay? Can’t you go?”—sealing the visit with one last laughable mistake.
The guests left politely, though clearly disturbed by the awkward exchanges. Mrs. Shaw was mortified and Mary, though still smiling, had begun to realise that polite conversation involved more than memorised phrases. The visit, while disastrous for her mother’s social ambitions, was a humorous lesson in the importance of timing, empathy and knowing when to stay quiet.
Despite everything, Mary had tried—and sometimes, learning happens best when things go hilariously wrong.

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